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TOPIC: How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You
#22849
curllets (User)
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How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You 2 Months, 1 Week ago Karma: 0  
This is some advice which will help you to forgive a friend, a relative or a boy/girlfriend who did something wrong that hurt your feelings.

Steps

1. Think carefully. If this person has suddenly come back into your life and asked for forgiveness, do not make a rash decision. Tell them you need some time to think about it, and you will definitely get back to them.

2. Take some time out of your day. Make sure you're alone, and in an environment that makes you comfortable. If it helps, cry. Think about what this person did to you, and whether you can trust them not to do it again. If you think you can, decide how close you want to become to this person. Make sure you realize and think through the following:

It is completely normal to feel angry or upset. But if you want to forgive this person and restore your trust in them, swallow your feelings. It will be easier to forgive this person if there is not a big amount of negative feelings towards them.

You must make sure it is a sensible decision to forgive this person. Small, sometimes even medium hurts can be healed. But it's also important to know whether the person is capable of hurting you again. If what they did to hurt you was a bad habit of theirs, they are most likely to hurt you again. For example, if a person lied to you, they would be more likely to do it again rather than someone who said one hurtful thing.

3.Contact the person. It is better to have a face to face chat, or at least a phone call. Talk to them about what happened, why you have decided to forgive them, and tell them that you are giving them your trust once more.

4.Take things slowly. If this person is an ex girlfriend/boyfriend, meet up with them a few times a month for a coffee and a chat. Try not to bring up things that happened in the past. Relive the story, but don't go back to the previous one.

Tips

Talking to a trustworthy person about your situation can help you sort out what you want to do.

Find a way to express your feelings-drawing, writing, exercise, etc.

Try to do hard work and format your brain about old memories on that someone.
 
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#22851
nenen422 (User)
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Re:How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You 2 Months, 1 Week ago Karma: 1  
Forgiveness is a crucial part of any meaningful relationship. We are all human and as such, completely fallible. Despite our best efforts, we will do things that hurt someone else. We all need forgiveness from time to time. When someone you love hurts you deeply, the natural instinct is to lash out. However, achieving true forgiveness ultimately helps you and your relationship much more. It takes a stronger person to forgive than to attack. Many people want to forgive but have difficulty actually doing so. Understanding the process of forgiveness can make it easier to achieve.

Forgiveness is a Gift to Yourself
By choosing to forgive, you take back the personal power that was stripped away. You cannot be a victim if you refuse to be victimized. Continuing to hold onto anger and hurt feelings lets the original act work against you long after it was committed. Forgiving the offender, however, makes the statement that you are no longer willing to allow him or her to hurt you.

Forgive someone and move on with life.

Forgiveness Does Not Mean Forgive and Forget
Forgive and forget is generally an unrealistic ideal. After all, our memories are not selective. We remember all sorts of things, particularly those that caused strong emotional reactions in us. You will not forget what happened, especially if it was severe, but you can let go of it.
If you choose to maintain a relationship with the person that you have forgiven, you will need to move the forgiven act to the past. You cannot achieve true forgiveness if the act is brought up as a weapon in future arguments. You will never forget the act, but you must move past it. Remember that you have also committed acts that required forgiveness. Put yourself in the offender’s shoes and allow empathy to guide your actions.

WE NEED ANGER MANAGEMENT!
 
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Last Edit: 2008/09/10 04:33 By nenen422.
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#22853
maryluthganda (User)
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Re:How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You 2 Months, 1 Week ago Karma: 0  
twin sis i am now forgetting as well as learn how to forgive him. daw ako ginanamean mo kadja haw twin sis (correct me f i am wrong) but anyway for me to forgive is very hard. but with the help of my supportive, loving, loyal, trustworthy, and genuine friends i learn how to forgive and move on. forgiveness enlighten our soul.
this certain guy whom i thought never lied to me hurt me in someways. i thought i will never ever forgive him bcoz of what he did to me. but after we seriously talked i forgve him. yeah who wouldn't thought i can forgve him? life is too long for me to bring hatred inside my heart. as i said to my twin sis i never expected that i can be gud even when im in the middle of my pain.
so twin sis cheersssssss tagay na ta gatas kung kay lolo datz pa
 
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#22856
Consoling (User)
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Re:How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You 2 Months, 1 Week ago Karma: 0  
Hulas karia mong, ang hurts mo isulod sa basket kag isab-it sa Cross ni Jesus. Kada batyag mo kang Hurts pangamuyo dangop sa Dios.

Kon si Tita Cons ang pamangkoton kang mga hurts makatugda gid kaninyo, duro nga hurts naagyan na mong.
Action nga buhaton:
1. Pray for that person nga makita mo ang matuod nga nga pagkatawo
2. Tugro-i kang 2nd chance kag indi paghukman. Maaram tana Dios karia
3. Tugro-i kang time nga mag reporma
4. Importante ang counselling, kolektaha ang mga suggestion kag laygay
5. Antis maghimo kang final nga disisyon timbangun gid ka husto for a hundred times (to keep the relationship or to depart....)
6. Angkunon mo ang resulta kang imong desisyon, avoid blaming others
7. Pero kon sa danger nga sitwasyon ikaw - take a refuge
and protect your life if possible.
8. Dangup gid sa Dios hay bisan ano kalisod ang imong nahimutangan, tugro-an na gid ikaw kang Kahilwayan.
9. Labaw sa tanan ipatawarun ang tawo naka-sakit kang imong baratyagon tungod hay ang Dios ang imong kaapin.
10. Sa bilog mo nga kabuhi hilway ikaw nga nakapatawad kag dunganon sa mayad nga kabubut-on.
 
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Last Edit: 2008/09/10 12:49 By Consoling.
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#22876
chicks (User)
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Re:How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You 2 Months, 1 Week ago Karma: 5  
How about if I am the one who had hurt you? will i be forgiven as easy as saying i am only a human being?

Would you forgive me if I cheated you right under your nose? would you think carefully and say i am only a human being and is worth a second chances?

Would you still be forgiving when the child I am carrying isn't yours?
Will you give yourself a day or two thinking that I am only human and is subject for tempetation?
Will you still have that open arms to accept forget and forgive me?
 
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This thread of togetherness has bound us throughout our lives it now sustain us, as we face the burden of our common cross with the certainty that our shared pain has a mighty purpose.. "We are the one."
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#22884
golden_heart (User)
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Re:How to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You 2 Months, 1 Week ago Karma: 0  
chicks wrote:
QUOTE:
How about if I am the one who had hurt you? will i be forgiven as easy as saying i am only a human being?

Would you forgive me if I cheated you right under your nose? would you think carefully and say i am only a human being and is worth a second chances?

Would you still be forgiving when the child I am carrying isn't yours?
Will you give yourself a day or two thinking that I am only human and is subject for tempetation?
Will you still have that open arms to accept forget and forgive me?

[color=#008000]
 
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Last Edit: 2008/09/15 20:49 By golden_heart. Reason: personal
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